Sunday, August 31, 2008

okay. a goal in action.

I have lived thirty years. I have a house full of stuff. Some things good. Some things really just are junk.

It's been bothering me for a long time. Some of this stuff isn't even mine.

I have one child and don't like having kids over. I SHOULD have kids over because I only have one child and she is lonely.

I don't want the house to get messier which will make me more miserable which will make life miserable for her who has to live with me.

I am trying to live a life using soaps, shampoos, conditioners, toothpastes and household cleaners with as few chemicals in them as I can possibly afford.. parabens, SLS and anything I really don't recognize I try to avoid which ironically, is more expensive.

I use baking soda as an abrasive. I use vinegar as a window and mirror cleaner and in my tea pot and coffee pot.

I collect all those strawberry/raspberry/egg cartons and try to use them again before recycling (which, in my city, really doesn't get recycled at this point.. not sure why, but it gets shipped to St. Thomas' dump, i think.. yet we have the three stream garbage system. Blue (recycling), Clear (waste) and Green (compost).)

I try to give those egg cartons to an egg seller at market.

I have these dreams. Dreams that I will make my house organized. Some days I really TRY at it, then feel guilty because my little one is bored because she doesnt want to help.. and everyday there's more to do.. and well.. i just dont know. I have been dying for school to start, which makes me feel guilty because I want her gone for some hours of the day so that I can have that time alone to clean.

I look around me and well.. what did I DO for thirty years? How did I get here? I take pride in trying to find my faults and conquer them, especially since many people are running away from them.. ignoring them and pretending they dont exist. That counts for SOMETHING, doesn't it? I try to look at the brighter side of things.. hoping that I will get through the lessons set out for this lifetime and actually evolve. I don't want to repeat these lessons and make the same mistakes.

I want to try something different.

I have had a thought. I don't know if I am brave enough.. but I wish to be. Maybe I will climb out on that limb and try to fly. Follow through with a plan that has been a dream for a long while. Dare to succeed.

My thought is to take a picture of the dreaded basement. The place I wish to set up as a studio. Blog it. Show it in its natural disaster and HOPE (oh gawd, I hope) to make it better. I hope for this picture to give me inspiration and drive to really devote time to it. make it a useful place. There are such great things down there that if only it was set up, it would be so wonderful.. so useful. I know I have unique ideas for ordinary things.. I could wow myself at what I come up with.

What do you think? Should I dare to show you my basement with that fear that maybe I may fail at giving you an "after" picture.. and be horribly embarrassed?

I have got nothing to lose but more time. where did those last ten years go?

Give me a week. I'll post you a picture. Lets climb out on that limb, Im getting tired of only dreaming about it.. I'll throw caution into the wind and see where it takes me.

x's folks.. thanks for reading.

A quick edit for a quote:

"Have nothing in your houses that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful.”

--William Morris

Thank you Queen of Fifty Cents for having this posted on the side bar of your blog!

1 comment:

Briana said...

Hey, thought you might like to check out this blog by a professional organizer.

It IS a lot of work to keep things organized! But once you set up some good systems for things its not as bad. Good luck to you!